


Daydream Fantasy

by coopermyagent



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Friendship, M/M, Secret Crush, Some Humor, just some deep-ish talk, remus is also just depressed, slightly mentioned dead parents?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-15
Updated: 2021-02-15
Packaged: 2021-03-17 17:33:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29475510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coopermyagent/pseuds/coopermyagent
Summary: Remus and Sirius chat about their favorite daydreams.just a lil one shot from a chaptered fic i’m writing that is A Lot more angsty but wanted to post this for now bc it made me happy
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Kudos: 8





	Daydream Fantasy

_How could it be that you knew me_   
_My deepest fears, my fantasies_   
_Confide in you what no one knows_   
_But it feels so real_

\- Janet Jackson

Much later they were sitting upstairs together in the dark looking out the window. James and Peter must have either fallen asleep or were just leaving them up here to their own devices. Their faces were illuminated by the moonlight and street lamps, and the space around them only filled with the sound of their breathing. Remus thought that it felt like a movie to be sharing this moment with Sirius, as they watched car headlights flash by them, heard people out in the world talking and laughing, and here they sat in the closed off quiet. It felt like such a peaceful moment amongst everything catastrophic in the world.

“Do you ever think about the fact that there are so many people out there having the worst day of their life on any given day?”

He didn’t usually voice these thoughts out loud. Mostly because there usually wasn’t someone there to listen, but also because he had never really felt so comfortable to do so. However, he felt that Sirius might also be thinking something similar right about now.

“Yeah, but there’s also probably a lot of people having the best day of their life right now too.” Sirius replied.

Remus considered this and said, “That’s true. But I don’t think as much. I think bad days come a lot more often than good ones.”

“Hm.”

“Sorry, that was depressing.”

“No, I mean yeah, but you might be right about that.”

They sat in silence for another beat and then Sirius asked something that caught him off guard, but it shouldn't have. “What do you think your best day has been?”

“Oh. I don’t know. I’d never really thought about it.” He wasn’t even sure what constituted a _good_ day for him.

“It doesn’t have to be your best ever, just one of the best.” Sirius pressed on. Remus took another moment to rifle through his backlog. He thought about days with his godfather, but there were only moments. Before his parents were gone were probably good, but it was impossible to pinpoint. The last few months then, surely.

“Hm. Probably that day after the game then. That was fun.” He said, and a huge smile spread across Sirius’s face that it almost felt like someone had turned on a light in the room. It was so bright.

“Yeah that was a good day. But come on, surely there’s a better one, we hardly did anything that day!”

“No, but that’s not really the point.”

“No I guess it’s not, but another one, there has to be another one.”

Remus had thought of another, but he had no way of explaining it. He hadn’t even tried to explain it to himself.

“Well there is one. But the thing is, I'm not even sure it’s real. I mean I think it is sometimes, but not all the time.”

“Makes no difference. What is it?” Sirius was leaning forward now, very curious.

“Well,” Remus began, “I think I was around 7 or 8 at the time. And I’m running in this meadow with grass, but sometimes it’s a field of flowers. But I’m always running or rolling down a hill. Sometimes there’s not a hill though. And I get to this tree where my mom is sitting underneath, and that’s always the same. She's always there, so that’s why I think it must be real, and she’s either reading or singing something. Sometimes there’s a lake in front of us and I can hear the water hitting the shore. I always get to her and sit down and fall asleep in her lap. So I think it’s a real memory but I don’t know because everytime I remember it, I remember it differently. But it’s definitely my favorite day. Real or not.”

Remus turned to Sirius to get his reaction, but Sirius was facing the window and his eyes were closed as he said, “That sounds really peaceful.”

“Yeah… it is. It always relaxes me,” Remus said, and to avoid dwelling on it further he asked, “What’s yours? Your best day.”

Sirius turned to him smiling a little mischievously and said, “Mmm. Probably the day after the game.” Sirius laughed as Remus swatted his face playfully.

“Hey!” Remus said, “You just said that couldn’t be mine. Pick another one.”

“Ok, ok,” He took in a deep breath and let it out, “Well it’s kind of similar, actually.” Remus’s ears perked up even more.

“But it’s more like a memory of the future.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well it hasn’t happened yet. But it’s also what relaxes me when I think about it.”

“So are we just sharing what our favorite daydream fantasies are?”

Sirius chuckled, “Looks like it.”

“Well what is it?” Remus suddenly felt very anxious to hear what Sirius daydreams about.

“Ok so I’m much older right? Like much older, I’m like in my late twenties or maybe even my thirties.”

“Woah, that’s so old,” Remus added in sarcastically.

Sirius rolled his eyes, “Yeah. Uh-huh. The point is a lot has happened since now, ok. And it’s late at night. Quite a night like tonight,” He gestures dramatically over the window. “I’m in a car and James is always there too, driving. You’re there too now, in the car I mean,” Remus feels heat rush to his cheeks.

“And so we’re driving late at night-”

“Is Peter there too?” Remus interrupts.

“Sure, yeah, why not. Pete’s in the car too, he’s in the back seat. So we’re driving late at night and we’re going-”

“Where am I sitting?” Remus butts in again.

“The passenger seat.”

“So you’re sitting in the back seat in your own daydream fantasy?”

“Yes.” Sirius states like that should be obvious.

“Why?”

“So that when I’m talking to you guys I can look at both of you at the same time!” He exclaims. “Do you want to hear my favorite daydream or not?!”

“Sorry! Sorry go on, we’re driving…”

“We’re driving somewhere and we’re excited to get there, and this song comes on the radio-”

“Where are we going?” Remus even laughs as he says it.

“It doesn’t matter.” Sirius said with a triumphant smile like he had already arrived at his point. “All that matters is that we’re going somewhere and we’re pumped. And then this song comes on we all love,”

“What’s the song?”

“Agh! It doesn’t matter. We just all love it and we’re so excited that it’s playing on _this_ night. And we all are quiet as the song plays. We don’t sing along, we just listen silently. And then when it’s over, James turns the volume down and he goes, ‘Those were some good times’. And we all agree going on like, ‘yeah that was the best ya da ya da ya da’. And then once we get to wherever we are going we have an even _better_ good time.” Sirius finishes and smiles like he’s trying to hold back an even bigger grin.

“So your daydream fantasy is a future good day where you’re looking back on a past good day?”

“I know it’s meta, right?”

“What do you think the good time that we’re all thinking about is like?”

“Doesn’t matter, it could be this moment right now.”  
Remus lets out a nervous chuckle. Sirius waits then continues,  
“The fantasy is just that everything has just always gotten better. Which is never really the case, things get good and then they get bad and so on.” Remus nods.

“So what do you want the song to be?” He asks.

“Hm?”

“If it’s this moment, you need to pick a song, otherwise we won’t remember it.”

Sirius pulls out his phone. He spends a minute searching while Remus picks at his thumb.

“This is a lot of pressure for one song.”

“I thought you said it didn’t matter what it was.”

“Well no, but,” He smiles sheepishly, “I guess it does a little, different songs mean different things.”

“Then just pick what you want the memory to mean.”

Sirius hands still and he stares like he’s trying to remember something. “Then I’ve got it.” He finally says.

A song begins, one they’ve both heard before, back in Remus’s bedroom.  
 _It’s a god-awful small affair_ -  
As per the memory they sit in silence. Remus wants to comment on the lyrics, he wants to know if Sirius and him have the same idea of what they mean. He forces himself to let it happen though, because it doesn’t matter if they do, it will mean the same to them now.  
 _Oh man, wonder if he'll ever know_  
 _He's in the best selling show_  
 _Is there life on Mars?_

“Good times.” Remus says and Sirius turns to him to catch his gaze as he says,  
“Yeah… I wouldn’t have needed a song to remember it.”

**Author's Note:**

> i’m writing so much more and there’s a whole lot more background plot that’s vaguely mentioned here ? - but wanted to see any reactions to this bc i’ve never posted my work before. comments would be very much appreciated :))


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